Patience is a virtue I’m still pursuing. I’ve made an effort, but I haven’t come close to mastering it. I excel at slowing down, enjoying myself, and not taking life too seriously, but I get easily agitated in situations involving others that are beyond my control. I try to laugh off people’s quirks, flaws, and stupidity by reframing the interaction, but often, I can’t find the humor.
I take a few deep breaths, try to practice mindfulness, and reflect on my irritability to understand where it originates and why it’s surfacing. The agitation subsides when I realize there’s nothing I can do to change the situation and accept the moment as it is. These instances usually occur when Vickie nudges me as she reads my patience pressure gauge even better than I do.
“A man who is a master of patience is master of everything else.” ~ George Savile
I recognize that my impatience arises from a self-centered mindset, that the world doesn’t revolve around me, and that everyone has their personal concerns, ambitions, and perspectives. Moreover, I understand that cultivating patience is not only virtuous but can serve as a powerful remedy for promoting health and happiness.
Patience is important for a well-functioning society, and it has become even more critical in our always-on, technocratic, convenience-is-everything culture. In the age of instant gratification, we’re used to getting what we want when we want it. Groceries, fast food, and same-day Amazon are dropped at the front door while we binge-watch an entire season of our favorite soap opera in a single weekend.
“The obsession with instant gratification blinds us from our long-term potential.” ~ Mike Dooley
This always-on social media lifestyle has created a very anti-social environment. Folks don’t even remember how to have face-to-face dialogue. Our ability to communicate has become seriously retarded in the 21st century. Practicing patience with ourselves and others might be the antidote we need to heal the divide in our country.
We get impatient with others when they won’t do what we want them to do. We don’t normally key their Tesla, smash in the windows, or burn it to the ground when they don’t conform to the way that we want things to be, but we do get impatient. Practicing patience with others is about acceptance and compassion, which are difficult enough on their own, so doing them at the same time is no easy thing.
“Happiness can exist only in acceptance.” ~ George Orwell
I know I can be irritating. Vickie and I have been married for nearly 40 years, yet a few of my quirks and eccentricities still drive her crazy. I’m hoping her acceptance and compassion start rubbing off on me, but we’re running out of time. Patience is most certainly a practice, so I’ll keep practicing and perhaps I’ll master it someday.
