Our journey through life has at times been chaotic, beautiful, sad, joyful, inspired, amazing, painful and oh, did I mention chaotic. One of the most important discoveries has been that life’s about learning. When you pay attention you learn the important lessons of life. When you don’t pay attention, those lessons keep repeating, again and again, until you do learn.
So, the quicker you learn life’s important lessons and integrate them, the happier you will become. Ignoring the lessons will indubitably lead to pain and suffering. At least that’s the way it seems to us after 6 decades of attendence at the “University of Life,” better known as the “School of Hard Knocks.”
When we were little tykes we were taught to believe that knowledge and wisdom came from attending school. The more school you attended, the smarter you’d become. That may have possibly been true at some point in history. But by the time I went to school in the 60’s, what I experienced was pretty much the opposite of that.
“Children must be taught how to think, not what to think.” ~ Margaret Mead
Flashback
I remember when I was in first grade. They rang the fire alarm and made us all run out into the hallway, single file of course. But instead of evacuating the building for a fire, they made us bury our heads in the little cubby boxes where we stored our galoshes. Later at recess, I asked one of my friends who was in third grade why we had to bury our head in our boots.
He told me, it was practice, just in case the Russians decided to drop a bomb and blow us to smithereens. I’d seen footage of Hiroshima from about 20 years previous, when the U.S. laid waste to Japan, so I knew what smithereens looked like. My first thought was, why would the Russians want to blow up a grade school. The second thought was, how in the world was burying my head in a boot locker going to save me from being annihilated by a nuclear blast.
“I shall write peace upon your wings, and you shall fly around the world so that children will no longer have to die this way.” ~ Teshima Yusuke
When I queried my third grade buddy again, he just shrugged his shoulders and said maybe we’re supposed to be training to kiss our ass goodbye or something. Then he said they might teach us that in 4th grade, before he headed for the monkey bars. So, I first caught a whiff of something that just didn’t smell right, in first grade. What I learned later was that important lessons come from the “University of Life,” not a State Sponsored School.
An Important Lesson
The lesson that I struggled with the most over the years was learning to listen without judgement. For years I had this strange need to agree or disagree with everything I heard. Bobbing my head up and down or side to side. I looked like a bobblehead dog in the back window of a Baja 1000 racing rig. And if my head wasn’t bobbing, my eyes were rolling.
“Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.” ~ Isaac Asimov
Why couldn’t I just listen with an open mind? Just listen without letting my ego in, to judge, agree or disagree. It was probably both genetics and early training that caused my pain and suffering. My parents were both expert debaters and they passed the trait down to me, both genetically and by demonstration. I don’t remember either of them ever winning an argument but it didn’t stop them from practicing.
One day though, a light switched on and I realized that while I was busy sharing my beliefs with everyone, I was missing the “important lessons” the Universe was attempting to teach me. Novel thoughts and ideas often come through or as a consequence of dialogue and interaction with the folks who we cross paths with in the Great Wide World. Conversely the internal dialogue and interaction we have with our ego, (The Judge) wants to keep us locked securely away in the status quo calaboose.
The School of Hard Knocks
The simple act of listening attentively may be one of the most difficult and important lessons that you learn in life. Many never learn it. Which brings up the concept that life is indeed the “School of Hard Knocks.” The Universe is constantly guiding and directing you to live your best life. To learn from your mistakes and evolve towards your destiny, graduating from the University of Life.
Alternatively if you don’t learn the valuable lessons; Pain and Suffering will escalate exponentially. Holding onto an opinion or a belief in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary only creates pain and suffering.
“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ~ Rumi
Life is the most important school you’ll ever attend. It teaches the lessons that lead toward your destiny. One of the most important lessons is learning to listen with an open mind, without judgement.
Everyone Has a Lesson
In life, you are constantly meeting new people and hearing their stories. It’s easy to pass judgement on someone based on first impressions or initial assumptions. But, if you take the time to really listen to what someone has to say, you may be surprised by how much you can learn from them. Everyone has a lesson to share, if you’re open to it.
“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.” ~ J. Krishnamurti
By listening, you learn about other people’s experiences and perspectives. In the process you can also gain a better understanding of yourself. Sometimes, the most important lessons you learn in life are the ones that are the most difficult. However, if you are open to learning, you can grow and change in ways you never thought possible.